I'm Not Who You Think I am
by aishababy
Summary: Spencer Reid looked in the mirror of his bathroom, frowning as he sipped of vodka from a ice filled tumbler, the bottle not far from his person as he gazed at his reflection. slash, language, read and review if you want me to continue this.
1. Chapter 1

Spencer Reid looked in the mirror of his bathroom, frowning as he sipped of vodka from a ice filled tumbler, the bottle not far from his person as he gazed at his reflection. Hollow brown eyes greeted him along with rich brown hair and prominent cheek bones coupled with a long narrow nose that tapered into a pixie point, thrown into shadow his facial structure took on a haunted look, refecting his inner feelings at the moment.

It had started this morning with the paranoia of being followed while on the subway, but had progressed into a feeling that was almost tangible in its potency causing him to constantly look over his shoulder and to keep a hand on his gun. It was completely ridiculous, this feeling, but at the same time completely rational to think someone had found him. Closing his eyes Spencer went over the day in his mind looking, trying to find anyone who was out of place or suspicious during his daily routine. Nothing, everything was in place right down to the look Morgan always gave him in the morning when he walked into the bull pen. The only thing out of place was the fight between him and Derek in the afternoon, before work was over.

They had planned on spending the weekend at one of Derek's properties, but due to Spencer's growing paranoia he had decided to not go. Morgan was angry about it, he had spent the last few days preparing the house for the weekend, only to now find Reid backing out at the last minute. The conversation then turned ugly when Spencer brought up the time when Derek had stood him up at a restuarant on their two month anniversary, when Derek himself had made the reservation, the rest of the comments went downhill from there, each picking on the faults of the other til, they had given up and both gone their seperate ways.

Sighing, the slight man pulled away from the mirror, downing the rest of his vodka, staring at his reflection reminding himself of who he was. He was tired of this game, Spencer realized, tired of the things he had to do for the government, tired of the people he always had to run from, he was tired of being Spencer Reid.

Someone knocked on Spencer's door as he refilled his glass, the sound making the glass in his hand ping. Quietly the young man made his way to the door stepping over the stacks of books that lay on the floor, he should really clean his apartment this weekend. Opening the door revealed a tall man in his early thirties late twenties with a hard face and small blue eyes and a noticeable scar on his chin, stared back at Spencer, the barrel of his gun pointed at the young man's chest.

"Goodbye, Dani."

Morgan woke in a cold sweat, panting heavily from a nightmare he couldn't remember.

Spencer stopped breathing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Sanity may be madness but the maddest of all is to see life as it is and not as it should be. - Don Quixote**

Derek Morgan walked into the BAU on Monday morning, irritated from an argument he had with his mother on his way to work. He had called her, thinking he would be able to understand where he was coming from, but it had turned out she argued Spencer's case, saying the Derek was pushing the relationship too hard and invading Reid's personal space. She had spoken about boundaries and that maybe Derek was moving to fast for someone not used to social interaction, and that maybe Spencer was just scared about the way he felt. Guilting Morgan to the point of anger, they had mutually said their goodbyes and hang up the phone, leaving the tall dark skinned man in the mood he was in now.

Dropping his bag at his desk Derek scanned the room for the object of his affections, and at the moment frustrations, looking over to the younger man's corner of the room finding it empty. Frowning Morgan scanned the room, only to find that while the rest of the team was present, Spencer, who was usually second to arrive, was no where to be seen.

"Hey Morgan, how was your weekend? You and Reid work out your problems?" Rossi asked as he walked by the taller man on the way to his office, a playful smirk on his face as he teased Derek.

"I haven't seen Reid since Friday, and he doesn't seem here either." Morgan groused, watching as the JJ and Prentiss walked in from the breakroom, Rossi stopping in front of the darker man, both contemplating the recent developments of past few minutes.

"Well you two did get into a fight the other day over a sleepover. Not to mention you came off as kinda strong, you know, with your all hands on his arms and all." JJ said her eyes taking a look of something similar to a disapproving mother hen, when talking about her daughter's boyfriend.

"Yeah, I would probably be upset too, if some man I'd been dating for what....five months, came and put his hands on me and started telling me I needed to go with him." Emily smiled, the teasing in her vocie partly serious to inform Derek how bad the conversation had looked from the outside view.

It was at this point that Garcia came out of her office, the brightly colored flower in her hair nearly falling out, a frantic look filling her eyes with moisture. Confused the team watched as the shorter woman leaned against the railing of the bull pen, trying to catch her breath as Hotch poked his head out his office to see the sudden commotion of his team.

"Morgan...Where does your Reid live...?" The dark skinned man frowned watching as the blonde woman infront of him tried to catch her breath.

"He said he lives somewhere on Baily Avenue. Why the need to know, Baby girl?" Garcia cringed at the question instead rushing over to the television on the other side of the room, flipping on the news station before rushing back into her office, slamming the door shut.

"That was strange, even for Garcia." Rossi stated looking back at the door the eccentric woman just closed, watching to see if something else would happen.

"Hey guys...there was a shotting at some apartments down on Bailey." JJ sounded strained as she reached for the remote to turn up the volume on the television, everyone looking to Morgan for confirmation.

Morgan was intent on the reporter on the screen watching as the image suddenly switched to the familiar buildings that he always dropped Reid off at after one of their nights out or when returning from a case. Suddenly all the air in Derek's lung were gone as once again the screen switched back to the reporter draw to the words spilling from her mouth, "Over the weekend a shotting occurred involving a law enforcement officer being gunned down in his home by an unknown assailant. Police and paramedics arrived on scene after neighbors were called in due to noise of gunshots....."

"Those are Spencer's apartment buildings...." Flying into action Derek ran of the stairs of the bull pen and began banging on Penelope's door, waiting for the hacker to appear.

Garcia opened the barrier between herself and the dark skinned man, wearing her coat and closing her laptop as she exited the room, grabbing Morgan's hand as the heavy set woman made her way to the exit. "Come on my Sugar-lover we have a sugar to soothe! Rapido! Rapido!"

Behind the rest of the BAU shot into gear, grabbing coats and bags before following the short mother bear out the door and into one of the black cars of the FBI.

"Okay, Garcia tell us where he's at." Derek said, his voice taking on a slight strain, buckling the seatbelt across his middle as Hotch took the wheel, pulling out of the parking garage and onto the road.

"He's was brought to Potomac Hospital, down on Triangle, it doesn't say the severity of his injuries here." Garcia glanced up from her screen for a brief moment to look at the people around her, gazing at each face as her team sped down the road. Hotch was focused, his eyes never leaving the road, but if Penelope looked close enough she could she the vein in his temple pulse just a little faster. Turning to Emily she saw only the normal indifferent expression, but felt the stress rolling of the dark haired woman's shoulders as she looked ahead of her. JJ was another story completely changing from anger to sadness in a matter of seconds, her head resting against the glass of the car window. Rossi was looked contemplatitve, thought Garcia, most likely already working on a profile of the scumbag who shot Reid. Looking at Morgan, Garcia saw the stress in his shoulders and the way his eyes looked at the seat Reid would usually occupy when they all rode together like this. She could feel his pain at that moment, and his fear, sliding a gray film over her vision. Slipping her hand into Derek's, Garcia prayed to whatever entity might hear her that their Spencer be in one piece when they found him.

They couldn't handle life without their baby.


	3. Chapter 3

**I know there is strength in the differences between us. I know there is comfort where we overlap. - Ani Difranco**

Tom and Jason were there when Spencer woke from surgery, the older of the two men sitting infront of the bed grasping the younger man's hand gently in his own while the other man stood by the window watching the ongoings of those below. Reid watched them for a moment, taking in the details of their appearances and faces before addressing them. It was always better for them to get reaquainted with each other before any real conversation began, allowing everyone to readjust to the situation and organize their thoughts.

Tom was the first to speak, his voice carrying softly in the small white room. "Did you know the man, Spencer?" He had never been one for pleasantries, but the younger man knew him well enough to know when he was upset at what happened from the strain in his voice.

Jason stayed silent watching Reid's face for traces of pain, the button controlling the morphine securely in his hand. Spencer frowned recalling the other day's incident with a bit of frustration, "It was Benjamin Franco, he was Greg's best friend from middle school." he was surprised how scratchy his voice sounded, the usual high tenor a now strained alto two.

Tom sighed, his hands going to run through the long black dreads that adorned his head, turning to look at older man for guidance, only to break the moment after silence continued to fill the room. "Well Gideon, any idea on what we should do next?" The tone of arrogance was evident in the younger man, frustration causing him to show more of his personality than first intended.

The old profiler leaned back in his chair, his hand going to run through Spencer's hair, gently easing apart some of the tangles that had formed as the young profiler slept. "The rest of your team will be here soon, knowing Garcia, she's not going to take a shotting sitting down." Watching Reid for a reaction, the aged man was not disappointed when his charge cringed at the mention of the analysis team.

"We need a plan on how to handle them and this Franco guy. We have to either reassign you, or figure out where the leak is and deal with it." Tom stated, pacing the length of the room as he thought out the options possible in this situation.

"Reassignment takes too long to do and is too suspicious in this stage of the game, also it would attract attention if an FBI agent suddenly disappeared after a shotting in his apartment.... No, the only option open to us at the moment is too find how the information of Spencer's whereabouts got out, as well as dealing with Hotch and his team when they get here." The older man stated standing up from the squeaky hospital chair, watching as Spencer shifted on the bed to get into a more comfortable position. Gideon could tell the younger man was still tired, his large brown eyes glazed over in fatigue as he fought to pay attention to the people around him.

"Spencer go back to sleep, you've been through surgery, you probably need it. Jason, I've got him the first shift you can go....Whatever it is you do when your not....here?" Tom said skeptical on the details of his partner's down time as he settled into the chair near the window, his warm brown eyes settling fondly on his charge as the younger nestled into his blankets to sleep.

Jason nodded, smiling at the picture the two government agents as both got comfortable in the overly sterile room, picking up on the gesture Tom adopted when Spencer was present.

"Then I'm going out for a bit, if you have everything under control." The playful jab did not go unnoticed by the younger men, Tom making sure to frown severly when he ruffled Reid's hair, the younger man smiling slightly the strain of his body becoming evident as the events of the past few days caught up with him.

As the frail looking man drifted into sleep, the older men nodding to each other, communicating on the condition of their charge before they both went on with the previously decided plans.


	4. Chapter 4

**You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; running comes across fields into your lover's arms can only come when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip. - Jonathan Carroll **

Morgan and Garcia led the way into the hospital, the rest of the team trailing behind them, both team members heading straight for the front desk when it came into range. "Excuse me miss, I have a friend here that came in over the weekend. Do you think you could tell me where he is?" The nurse looked up at the dark man her eyes glued to his as she shuffled through some papers she held in her hands.

"Um....Sure. What's his name?" Smiling Morgan and the nurse quickly exchanged information, before the man walked away, winking to the woman as he left the front desk.

"He's on room 656 on the fourth floor." The team headed for the elevator as the dark skinned man spoke, Penelope at the head followed closely by JJ as they rounded the corner.

The ride in up to the fourth floor was quiet, the atmosphere tense as the light flashed to signal the contraption was traveling at all. Morgan sighed as the BAU team walked out of the elevator when the doors opened, quickly taking in their surroundings before heading over to the private room that read Reid, S. on the occupation plate.

Morgan reached for the door handle closing his eyes and bracing himself for whatever he was about to see, he and Spencer may not have been together romantically for long, but he still felt a strong connection to the younger man, making them inseperable most of the time, even when they were having fights. Penelope grasped Morgan's hand in her own silently giving him the support he may need to enter the room. Together they breathed and opened the door.

Spencer was asleep when the team opened the door, his thin arms resting above the blanket limply as the wires and tubes monitored his condition. He looked smaller in the hospital. Granted he was already rather scrawny as it was but the sterile environment and machines surrounding Reid dwarfed him even more.

Morgan stepped into the room, followed slowly by the rest of his team as they assessed the situation, moving closer to the lanky body in the white hospital bed. Sitting down beside unconscious colleague reached forward laying his large hand on Reid's forehead gently running his fingers into his hair, as he did so much outside of these circumstances. Spencer shifted in his sleep, his eyes fluttering under his lids, leaning his body slightly into the touch and gently curling in on himself. Derek smiled his hand moving down to stroke his face tenderly as Penelope look at the younger genius's medical records posted on the bed.

Clicking her tongue impatiently, Garcia flipped through Reid's records reading, frowning as she found the notation for surgery explaining the details and complications that occurred during the procedure. "It says here he was shot in the chest and that one of his lungs were hit. The damage was minimal but it still happened. He stopped breathing on the operating table and the had to massage his heart to get him going again. But he's been stable for two days and improving. That's good news right?"

The rest of the team frowned watching as their youngest member shifted again in his sleep this time his eyes fluttering open, his eye lids drooping tiredly as he took in his surroundings. First noticing Derek sitting by him in the hospital chair, his hand still placed lightly on Spencer's forehead in a comforting gesture, his eyes staring down into his own with an intensity that spoke of the relationship they had inside and outside of work and romance breaking them down into dear friends.

"Hey Angel....." Morgan was the first to speak his voice thick but quiet as the endearment fell from his lips, his eyes were watering the emotions of the past hour finally catching up with him as he saw that Spencer was going to be okay.

Reid watched as the older man lifted his hand into the larger one's, lacing their fingers in an intimate gesture that was reciprocated as Spencer squeezed his hand lightly in Derek's. "Hi......what are you guys doing here?" His voice no more than a strained whisper as he tried to communicate with BAU team.

Penelope smiled from her position at the foot of the bed, watching as the two men interacted with each other, the rest of the team following suit, happy that their were a completed unit again.

"Sorry to interrupt.....but Spencer needs his rest." Jason Gideon stood in the doorway his partner leaning against the wall eyes looking into space.


End file.
